demonhunting:

is ellen even hosting or is she just hanging out with famous people

  • Mom: Who are you texting?
  • Me: My crack dealer

50shadezofcarter:

I text back embarrassingly fast

or three hours later

there is no in between

(Source: 50shadezofcarter)

kawashironitori:

talking to person u like alot and u feel like ur annoying them

image

katkinkat:

i wish i could say “?????????” in real life it would be very useful

(Source: baebees)

actuates:

HOW TO PLAY SOCCER IN GYM CLASS:
1. Get the ball
2. Pass it to someone who actually knows how to play
3. Run.

drifters-soul:

How do I politely ask him to push me against a wall and bite my neck and grab my butt and bite my lip and make me moan?

funflowur:

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